-Jonnikins’ Way Of Living-

-One more subject to go,la la la la….

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-Going to cut my hair this Friday! First time in two years (I think) that I’m getting a proper haircut instead of shaving all of them off.I hope it looks good.

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-Goings to KL two days after SPM,on the so called "prom" night of Chung Hwa.I need to buy a bunch of new clothes for CNY next year, only have 2 for now cause I find it really hard to buy clothes for myself,don’t know why.I think I’ll end up buying some and leaving the rest for my mom to buy,haha.

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-It’s been a while since I played video games so I bought some a few days ago.I’m addicted! Totaly forgot how fun it used to be.

As I have promised,I’m going to blog about my ~*interesting*~ day yesterday.

   Well at first it was just an ordinary trip to my grandma’s place at Tanah Merah.Eventhough Bio’s paper is in Monday I decided to go sis my aunt and her daughter came back to visit from Singapore (Pfffftt like i will study anyways).It’s always nice to see them both.Everything was fine until another group of relatives came to visit them as well (what can I say,my family is HUGE). They started asking about my exam. The way they talk just teared my heart to tiny little pieces,oh god that sounds so cheesey but I can’t think of a more suitable description. For you all chung Hwa F5,you know how many of us talk to Ee Jane,Mei Yee,Maria,etc (aka the brilliant ones). Here’s one of the conversations:

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-Relative:So how’s the exam?

-Me:Okay I guess…

-Relative:So how many As’ are you getting this time? I have high hopes for you! *big smile*

-Me:Don’t expect anything good from me,I might not getting any As’ or just 4 or 5 maximum. *feels really bad*

-Relative: *laughs* Nonsense! I’m sure you won’t dissapoint,you’re Weng kin!

-Me:Trust me,my results suck this few years..

-Relaitive:There you go again,I’m sure you’ll get great results again!

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After having that converstion SEVERAL times I just lost it.Honestly I almost broke down,my whole body was like shaking with the anger and sadness………. It’s sad that people have so much faith in me and I will just dissapoint them when March comes.SPM is almost over and I no longer have a chance to redeem my dignity.I’ll just lock myself up in my room for three months after I get the results.I know I’ll probably go crazy watching people’s reaction to my results. "What wengking got ___ As’ only? Haha you think I’m going to trust you? " .

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-Sorry if I sound arrogant or conceited,maybe many of you already know that my result suck.If you do I thank you,how I wish everyone else knew. There’s more to this,I’ll edit this post later,I have somewhere to go……

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Blahhh,after one day I’m back to this post.I’m thinking about deleting this post but I’ll just leave it cause I’m weird like that.I’m thankful that the day ended in a lighter note.I joined my younger cousins in their bike riding and ball playing.I haven’t played that much since forever! It feels nice to sweat a little.Then we played cards late night, hopefully I didn’t use up all my luck cause I won many times,muahahaha. Thanks guys!

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-One step at a time,there’s no need to rush……………….

1.35 a.m. and I’m exhausted! That’s rare.Interesting day oday,I’ll blog about it tomorrow.Gotta go oi oi now…. Bre ready for a massive load of self-pity.

-1A or 11As’,I will accept whatever results I’m going to get next March.I know how much I studied,I know how good I am.It’s been hard to come to terms with myself but I think I will in time.I’ll just hypnotize myself for the next few months..

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-A few days ago I found out that I lost almost 1000 songs in my computer.The spyware was too violent for the repair guy to backup the files.I felt like my soul was sucked out of my body,No Music No Life! I need to thank Mr. Wee Hon Kee for this "fortunate incident" (jk jk). These few days I’ve been downloading and ripping songs from my CDs like crazy…-

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-This is a reply to Lynnie cause I can’t seem to comment on my own blog,!$@! :

-You’re so lucky!!!!! I’m jealous.Too bad I’m not taht interested in MCR.The only song that I really like is I Don’t Love You,muahaha.When will my dream to see my idol’s concert come true???

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-I WANT TO LEARN HOW TO PLAY THE GUITAR!! I’m obsessed with acoustic songs !

-What’s wrong with Friendster lately?It took me 10 minutes to load this page.Completely "freezed" my "fire" to blog.(but still blogging anyways,hahahahahahaha…)

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-If any of you ever wonder why I like to type in point form that’s because I’m to lazy too think and stupid Friendster won’t let me have spaces in between.tsk tsk tsk..

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-4 days till SPM,I’m dead.I can see my parent’s and relative’s face when I tell them my results in my dreams/nightmare.*shivers* Some of them actually think them I’m capable of getting 9 to 11 As’???!!! I AM NOT CAPABLE OF DOING THAT!! I REPEAT,I AM NOT CAPABLLE OF DOING THAT!!! Ughhhh,the stress is making me crazy.I can only hope for 4 or 5 A’s.I’m no longer that guy who always gets good grades.Actually my results has been spiraling down ever since I secondary school.I used to be a very smart kid,muahahahahahaha.Anyways,I’m still worried about how they would react in March.I can only hope for the best I guess.

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-My cousin told his mom that he’s going to "audition" for a military school in the near future.If he gets it he’ll be spending his Form 4 and 5 in KL in a military school.I’m not sure if it’s the same one as the guy from my batch went to.I envy my cousin for knowing what he wants in life at such a young age.I still have no idea what the hell I am going to be in the future.The only reason that I’m not leaving SMCH is that I still haven’t figure out what career path suits me and I’ve been trying for wo years now! My head hurst,argggghh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!@$#!$

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-I’m trying to be a more positive person,for myself.Self-pity is not good for my health.

No one likes an emo kid…….